George cried. The throbbing aches would not cease. The cancer had spread throughout his body and attacked where it wanted. The attending physician had offered to alleviate the suffering with the strongest medication available and allow him to sleep, but he refused. The pain was a reminder of the agony his loved ones had experienced before they left the earthly life, and he wanted to be of a sound mind and awake to feel every bit of it just as they had.
This was important to George since he had sat at the bedside for most of them while he was still relatively strong and healthy, yet felt so helpless in taking away any of their aches. Now he was the one in agony and again believed that experiencing the intense pain firsthand would be a fair and just ending to his life. Beyond that, he believed the suffering would somehow bring him closer to each one of his dearly departed.